Friends don't let friends derail job searches

Networking is the name of the job hunt game. So naturally, you look to your closest circle of friends and family to kickstart your search. And no wonder—going through loved ones is about as warm, fuzzy, convenient and non-threatening as you can get.

Still, immediately calling your best high school buddy might have its risks, says this CNN.com article. Even people with the best of intentions can accidentally hijack your search by going overboard with advice, opinions and scatter-shot campaigning on your behalf.

The trick to reigning in the potential madness: Carefully develop a communications plan that calls on the most strategically selected contacts in your personal network. This way, you have more control over your search, while drawing on the best tips and connections your friends and family can offer.

That said, I have a couple do's and don'ts to add to the article's list:

DO consider your emotional network. This is especially important when you're considering relocation. Do you already have friends or family living there? Who can help recommend areas to live? Who will be around to show you the ropes and help acclimate you? I know it's not imperative to know somebody in a new place, but it does make the transition a little easier.

DON'T compromise your personal goals. It can be tough to stick to your guns about developing inexpensive laptops for children in third-world countries when a friend or relative desperately wants you to be an NYC investment banker. Take their desires in stride, and remember it's YOUR happiness at stake. If they care for and support you—as most friends and family do—the will likely adjust to whatever decision satisfies you most in the end.

DO listen to war stories—but take them with a grain of salt. Other people's job search adventures are usually worth hearing. After all, you might gain a useful tip, insight, warning, or new contact. But be selective about what you use for guidance. Remember, each search is unique to the seeker, so perspectives are biased from the start. Plus, time passes, circumstances change, and industries shift, making many cautionary tales irrelevant to you. Instead, view your search as objectively as possible in its current context, and keep war stories filed in the back of your mind.

Any others? Share them here!

Posted by Christy H.